Random Notes

So for years now I've been writing notes down all over the place. Tons of them. Everywhere! It's fun finding them months or years later and especially amusing when the context is missing.

I'm not sure if this actually happened to me or if I was trying my hand at fiction.

'It began innocently enough. She went to a liquidation sale at one of her favorite bookstores. There were two books sitting on a shelf and the one on the left really caught her attention. She was quite a ways away from the book and two girls were getting dangerously close to the thing she was so enamored with. It took all of her self control not to break into a sprint for it, plus the girls were right on top of her "precious" at the moment and she was sure that they would definitely notice it and snatch it up. She cooly (at least cooly was what she was going for) making her way toward but if you were the guy in the selfhelp section who notices everything you would think she was eyeing two fat girls and awkwardly trying to get the last copy of some book."


The names have been changed to protect the innocent.

"hey drunk Bob you called Bob and Bob and they didn't answer. No worries."

That little voice in your head...

What? I suppose your inner monologue sounds like you? How...quaint.

Sketch Comedy Y'all

There are few things I love more than sketch comedy shows. Seriously if I had kids it'd be close (as in the kids would come in a close second. Sorry people that don't yet exist). Or if like a loved one and sketch comedy shows were hanging off the side of a cliff and holding onto to each of my hands and I had to choose which hand to let go, well lets not make me say it out loud and we can pretend I'd make the right choice.


Nick Kroll gets his own sketch comedy show and it's about damn time!

I totally get David Lynch now. I was watching Everybody Loves Raymond and Debra kept dropping the thanksgiving turkey she was getting ready to cook. It was raw so it was slimy and she kept losing her grip and it was pretty funny, but it made me think that if a turkey was watching it it would be horrific instead of comical. Like if she kept dropping a human torso it would be macabre and the canned laughter would seem sinister and totally out of place. it almost as if you're the only sane person in an insane asylum.



On a mostly unrelated note they've decided to remake Evil Dead.  Totally not sure how i feel about this.

Hit the interweb hard on a vocab hunt!

Disclaimer;

I love unusual words but these will be really hard to slip into casual conversation and not come off like a pretentious douche.

pulchritudinous- physically beautiful, comely.

schadenfreude- to take pleasure in another's misery

portmanteau-  A portmanteau or portmanteau word is a blend of two (or more) words or morphemes into one new word. My personal favorite is Nerdiots. It's my pets' pet name:)

Bedew- cover or sprinkle with drops of water i.e. when someone tells you the the weather and not the news.

ophideophobia- fear of snakes

Banana republic- is a pejorative term originally used to refer to a country that is politically unstable, dependent on limited agriculture (e.g. bananas), and ruled by a small, self-elected, wealthy, and corrupt clique. I think I just like this one becuase I imagine a country of B1 and B2's

Neologism- a newly coined word or expression.

erudite- having or showing great knowledge.

Go forth and use these words! I comandeth thou!

10 Things I Know To Be True

I thought it would really interesting to find out what everyones 10 are. I came across this article on Ted.com and really liked the concept. It's a great way to learn more about yourself and friends.

http://www.ted.com/conversations/6514/we_can_learn_by_exchanging_and.html#.TtcJzShA4Iw.facebook

 By Cleo Abram

"We can learn by exchanging and discussing our own lists of "10 Things I Know to be True."

After listening to Sarah Kay's beautiful speech and poetry, I tried to write my own list of "10 Things I know to be True." I learned one thing immediately: I don't know much. I learned a second thing more slowly: that's okay! I tried to distill my limited understanding of the world into this list, without being overly philosophical nor literal.

One thing I know to be true, but that is not on my list, was that Sarah Kay was right when she said that if you share your list with a group of people you will find that someone has one thing very similar, someone else has something totally contrary, another person has something you've never heard of, and still another has something that makes you think further about something you thought you knew.

So let's share ours, and find out! What do your lists have on them?

Here's mine:

1. Fiction can, at times, feel more real than fact.

2. One person, with a good idea, can change our world.

3. There are things about our universe that we will never understand.

4. #3 is not an excuse to stop trying.

5. Everyone has a story worth hearing.

6. There is always another side to the story they tell.

7. Questions can sometimes teach more than their answers.

8. Children can sometimes teach more than their parents.

9. Everyone should travel.

10. No one's truth is universal."

These are mine. :)

1. If someone says something with enough conviction people will believe it.

2. Youtube commenters are mostly racist, chauvinists, who don't know how to use spell check. And you're better off not reading them.  

3. People who don't like kitties are lying or pathological. 

4. You can't have an actual discussion with someone who just wants to change your mind likewise you can't get anything from a conversation if you refuse to believe you might be wrong.

5. If you're bored then you're boring.

6. the world will be a better place when people realize they shouldn't try to control someone else from doing something that doesn't affect them.

7. An attitude adjustment can change your station in life.

8. Refined carbs are killing us and making us dumb, fat, & ugly.

9. Jealousy and greed are great motivators. It motivates some people to try really hard in school or at work while it motivates others to campout outside of Wall Street for months.

10. There are always two sides to a story.

emoticon sounds like a good name for a robot...or a girl.

or a robot girl...




i feel like my grammar and writing structure is so poor

that even when I'm writing sober it has a certain

intoxicated pizazz (that's right i took it to the

thesaurus for that sentence). in fact i think from now

on I'm going to throw in "intoxicated pizazz" in at least

once a day (in more than one way ). ill wield "intoxicated

pizazz" so well it will be synonymous with the name

Dartagnian (i will also change my name to Dartagnian) and

will be carved into the front of my tombstone along with

the words "for a good time call(insert your name here) , at first

you'll be mad but then it will be funny, the funny will

change to sad then cycle back into anger and finally settle

into quiet reflection followed by uncontrollable crying

jags. at least that's how i imagine it.